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September, 2017


Amber tells of her battle against this misunderstood mental illness

BEHIND Amber Foy’s beautiful blonde hair, 100-watt smile and intelligence is a young girl battling an incredibly misunderstood mental illness. Diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder a few years ago, it means that on any given day, at any time, the 19-year-old can overreact to something completely trivial. She has complete meltdowns and can inflict physical injuries on herself. “The best way I can describe it is absolute chaos,” she said. “For a while I feel like I’m holding on to my emotions and sense of self and reality. “After aRead More

The Differences Between Highly Sensitive People and Empaths

As a psychiatrist and an empath, I often get asked, “What is the difference between empaths and highly sensitive people?” Following are the similarities and areas of overlap. (I also devote a section of The Empath’s Survival Guide to this important distinction.) Empaths share all the traits of what Dr. Elaine Aron has called “Highly Sensitive People,” or HSPs. These include: a low threshold for stimulation; the need for alone time; sensitivity to light, sound, and smell; and an aversion to large groups. It also takes highly sensitive people longer to wind down after aRead More

10 Signs It’s Narcissistic Abuse

Kristen Seaman Writer Relationship abuse can come in many forms and – while not always the case – often happens because of an underlying issue or psychological diagnosis. One diagnosis is narcissism, where the individual suffers from an idealized image of themselves, a lack of empathy and a pathological craving for admiration. While a lot of symptoms of abuse overlap among the different forms, the following signs may indicate narcissistic abuse. He makes you feel delusional Gaslighting is a common sign of abuse: when your partner tries to invalidate your feelings and makesRead More

This Is Why Empaths Act Crazy When They Are Around Inauthentic People

Empaths have a strong sense of integrity. They know they shouldn’t lie for personal gain, or to manipulate others, and although they strive towards living their truth, it is difficult to do when the world is filled with such dishonesty and corruption. We are living in a time where silver-tongued fraudsters, who spin twisted webs of deceit, are rewarded for their outspoken dishonesty, and those who speak their truth often get attacked. And because of this, many end up living in a state of cognitive dissonance. Whilst the world isRead More

why Infidelity is so different for Men and Women

Coming to Terms With Infidelity: Men Versus Women There is a school of thought that says if a woman cheats, it is more likely to signal an end to her primary relationship than if a man cheats. And this may in fact be the case, because men and women tend to think and feel differently about sex and relationships. Men are generally more likely than women to be able to compartmentalize sex and intimate connections. For many men, sex is sex, and relationships are relationships, and the two do not necessarily overlap. Thus,Read More

why Infidelity is so different for Men and Women

Put another way, male sexual desire tends to be driven by physiological rather than psychological factors. This is why porn sites created for male users feature short scenarios focused on body parts and overt sexual acts and little else. Even porn literature for men tends to focus more on sexual acts than on relationships and feelings. Not so for women. Open up a romance novel, or tune in to True Blood, the Twilightmovies, or other female-oriented romance/erotica, and you’ll see this rather clearly. In such stories, you’ll find very little in the way ofRead More

The Narcissistic Father

“Half the harm that is done in this world is due to people who want to feel important. They don’t mean to do harm, but the harm (that they cause) does not interest them. Or they do not see it, or they justify it because they are absorbed in the endless struggle to think well of themselves”. ~ T.S. Eliot You used to think that by the time you were in your twenties and definitely by your thirties you’d have your act together – you’d be establishing a successful career, have your own place, beRead More

The Narcissistic Father

When you go through these traits, some may hit home; while others may not be relevant. Some may ring as very true; while others as less so. This is why narcissitic traits are not synonomous with a Narcissistic Personality Disorder. The Heuristic Problem of Personality Classification: Narcissism is not a dirty word, in fact, narcissistic traits are commonly found in most of us. There’s nothing disturbed about that. The other extreme is the Narcissistic Personality Disorder, a controversial, but often helpful label. For the record, our diagnostic categories are somewhat arbitrary and lack the veracity of harderRead More

Being empathetic is good, but it can hurt your health

(Jun Cen for The Washington Post) By Jennifer Breheny Wallace September 25 Your husband was just passed over for a promotion, and he’s depressed. Your friend’s breast cancer has returned. As a supportive spouse and friend, you feel their pain. Growing research suggests there’s a cost to all that caring.Empathy — the ability to tune into and share another person’s emotion from their perspective — plays a crucial role in bringing people together. It’s the joy you feel at a friend’s wedding or the pain you experience when you see someone suffering.It’sRead More

Being empathetic is good, but it can hurt your health

But the researchers also discovered that those who were asked to react to the essay with compassion — who thought about how the other person might be feeling but didn’t share the emotion — had a positive, invigorating arousal response, as if they were confronting a challenge that was achievable or offering advice that might help improve the student’s situation. “People assume that any kind of empathy is associated with positive health benefits and behaviors, but for the first time we have physical evidence that not all empathy is alike,Read More