4 Behaviors A Narcissist Displays That Reveals Their True Colors
3. VINDICTIVE BEHAVIOR
Get into an argument? The narcissist will spread lies about who was right and who was wrong, eager to paint you as the person who had wronged them in every situation. A vindictive person is always trying to get back at those who they have deemed to have wronged them. If you notice this in a person but are lucky enough not to be the target, you may very well be dealing with a narcissist – and you just haven’t gotten on their bad side yet.
But why the lies?
Dr. Joseph Burgo states, “Because of his distorted, defensive relationship to reality, the Extreme Narcissist often believes the lies he tells, both to himself and other people. He doesn’t see himself as a liar but rather as an embittered defender of the ‘truth’ as he has come to see it.”
The narcissist is always the one to paint themselves as the victim, no matter what, even if they are clearly in the wrong. Be careful if you are not on the receiving end of a narcissist’s revenge – one wrong move, and you very well could be.
4. INDIFFERENCE TO EMOTIONAL OUTCOMES
The narcissist doesn’t care about the outcomes of high-stress or high-emotion situations, so long as they come out on top. If some sort of argument or disagreement has escalated enough for them to lose their friends and family connections, it doesn’t matter, so long as they are the ones who are “winning” in the argument. They only want to feel as they have behaved in a way that seems reasonable and fair to them, even if they have done everything in their power to destroy the connections that they have made through life, through either friendships or familial relationships.
Dealing with a narcissist can be very overwhelming, especially if you’re entirely unaware as to why someone is behaving the way that they are. Keeping an eye out for these behaviors in your relationships can make it easier to arm yourself against the manipulation and emotional abuse that a narcissist is capable of. While being aware of the behavior may not allow you to avoid being caught up in it altogether, it’ll give you a starting point on how to get yourself free of a toxic individual.
“Half the harm that is done in this world is due to people who want to feel important. They don’t mean to do harm, but the harm [that they cause] does not interest them. Or they do not see it, or they justify it because they are absorbed in the endless struggle to think well of themselves.” – T. S. Eliot
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