Dealing With the Challenges of Being an Empath (or Highly Sensitive)
Feeling Into Blockages
Let’s look at the beneficial nature of being an empath, or having empathic qualities, for a moment. Because to truly unleash beingness and shed distortion, is to express the truth in the distortion — you’re activating the distortion because the soul is trying to break through an area of limitation.
In having empathic tendencies as a spiritual catalyst, means that you can feel into and harmonise with the feelings of another – especially their density. In the Facilitator Work we do at Openhand, I get the group to practice expanding their field out to embrace their partner within, then to explore exactly what they’re feeling.
Then, as the catalyst, you bring attention – energy – to the places you feel are blocked. You literally direct your focus to these places. And it helps also to direct the partner to those feelings. You can use intuitive questioning to explore why the blockage is there… “tell me what the word ‘worthlessness’ means to you?” for example. In this alchemical cauldron, merely the use of such a word, delivered intuitively, can be enough to spike an outburst, an unwinding, a release.
It’s like you’re reaching inside your partner, harmonising with them, then resonating a frequency of realignment. The blockage unwinds and falls away, that blocked aspect of soul is reminded of itself; the soul then integrates; miraculous alchemical healing and transformation takes place.
None of this could have been possible without the empathic qualities. Paradoxically, a really good catalyst, also has really good empathic qualities.
The Canary in the Coalmine
But empaths have something much deeper than what a catalyst can truly express. They can take on all the nuances of another’s energy, which could even be the planetary system such as Gaia for example. Such a gift has the capacity to manifest the unseen – that which is repressed and hidden from clear sight. By revealing the density in this way, means that people – such as catalysts – can begin to work with it.
I’ve sat in many spiritual groups where somebody is sitting peacefully and in harmony, feeling very evolved, and yet the empath next to them is in emotional agony, expressing that which the other isn’t yet willing or able to express.
That’s why I often consider the empath like the proverbial canary in the coalmine. That’s what makes their gift so valuable to the world and the evolving group. That’s why we should cherish these people and their gifts and not see them as some kind of affliction.
Yet before they’re developed, they can indeed manifest as the most terrible affliction — fear of the world, reclusiveness, hyper sensitivity, listlessness and directionlessness, lack of motivation, stress and anxiety.
So how to deal with these challenges?
I’d say the key lies in the reflection the catalyst can offer.
The Vital Importance of Setting Effective Boundaries
A catalyst inherently sets boundaries effortlessly. For me, it just happens. You could sit me in the middle of an emotional hurricane, and I will still find my own vibration. So here’s the first key – knowing your own vibration.
You have to keep exploring your own vibration as much as possible and in your own space as much as possible – especially if you’re in partnership – especially if you’re in partnership with a catalyst (which by the Law of Attraction can tend to happen – opposites attract!).
So this will involve developing your own rituals and practices: your own spiritual practice like meditation, yoga or tai chi for example; what you eat, when you eat, what NOT to eat – you can easily override these boundaries with a partner when they’re less effected by the ‘microclimate’.
Sensitivity is the key here. An empath is highly sensitive, and in order to centre in your vibration, you have to focus on the things that truly serve you and those that don’t. Just because your loving partner ‘gets off on something’, and just because you feel a yearning to compromise behaviour, doesn’t mean you should compromise your soul!
You see that’s one of the other big hurdles for an empath to overcome — they have a highly active ray 4 — the diplomat aspect of the soul. They want to harmomise. But often overstretch the boundary so they dissolve into the other person’s/people’s vibration. And here’s where the tragedy so easily begins.
You’ve got to embrace the sense of focus of the catalyst. Not close down on the world no. But just be really clear about your boundaries.
When you know your boundaries, then you can start to have a positive effect on the world through the field. Less and less, you stop being washed around by all the flotsam and jetsam. You become increasingly centred.
Then when an inflow of negative energy begins to invade you, you can work with it. How?
Assert Yourself: Breathe In, Impart Your Energy, Breathe Out
The best way I have witnessed, is to breathe it in and relax, hold the breath, radiate it with light, then breathe it back out again, in the direction from whence it came.
You’re accepting the energy, feeling into it, but being really clear it’s not you. Then having a positive impact on it, by bringing your soul vibe to it, before breathing that back out again.
You’re not rejecting your gift in this way. But neither are you getting lost in the external vibration. You’re having a positive influence on it by asserting yourself. And in asserting yourself – your highest vibration of truth, love and light – then you’re breathing that back out into the world and having a positive impact on it.
There will be places where this incoming energy gets stuck first though – it happens where there’s (understandably, subtle judgment of the energy). Maybe slightly veiling your incredible discernment of the energy, is subtle judgment of the impact it has on you? This is where there might be some reaction to the world by an unrealised aspect of your soul. This is what you’ll first have to work with, by softening into the contractions you feel – the reactions. But softening into them doesn’t mean accepting them as you. It means surrendering to the truth of them, but then working to release them – by bringing light into them in the way I’ve described.
So feel your contractions, soften into them, unwind them, become as One in them, and then allow your higher self to infuse them with your own higher vibe. Then release them back out into the world from whence they came.
You might also have to raise the warrior in this experience, especially if the energy is particularly dense and clingy. I know this part is not always easy for a sensitive empath, but you have to be clear about your own vibe, the importance that you stand assertively in your own truth.
Keep Developing The Gift
I welcome the involvement of empaths in the Openhand healing work. It’s an amazing gift you have. We’ve been blessed thus far that so many of you have found your way to our shores. Long may it continue.
Remember to look at the reflection your divine counterpart – the spiritual catalyst – might be able to offer. The universe put us together for a reason!
Hopefully, this approach might help ease and integrate the wonderous gift that you empaths embody. I feel for you. My heart goes out to you. I encourage you to master your gift for the good of all people in these challenging times. You are truly special.
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