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Life After Loving a Narcissist


Not once in my life did I ever think I would need to write these words. Not once did I ever think I would leave myself so vulnerable to fall under the spell of a narcissist but it happened. So here’s my story and what I learned about how to love myself after loving a heartless man.

I had just gotten a divorce and was taking a ride on the emotional roller coaster that comes along with it. I had finally found peace and was starting to be happy again. I was finding myself and loving myself and felt a sense of comfort that only God can provide. I wasn’t looking for anyone new because I had finally accepted the fact I was alone and was actually okay with it. Then he came along… and my world flipped upside down. There is so much to say, it’s going to be hard for me to stay on track but I am going to start from the beginning when it was amazing because without that part, you won’t understand why it ended the way it did – you won’t understand what a narcissist is unless you know it all.

Like I said, I wasn’t looking for anyone. He found me… he CHOSE me. I got a message one day, asking when I would let him take me out on a date and show me how I’m supposed to be treated. He would have me, “Throwing rocks at all them other guys.” Well, that sounded real smooth but at that point I was still not ready, so I turned him down. A month later, I got another message; this time he wasn’t asking me out, just making small talk. He needed a favor and being the helpful person I am, I agreed, not knowing I was opening myself up to one of the biggest lessons I would learn in my life.

After a month of talking and him making himself out to be a really great guy, we decided to go out one night. It was game over from there… I was hooked. He made me feel like I could talk to him about anything. He had been through similar things as I had, went through a bad divorce, had a toxic marriage, lost a parent. He made me feel safe, something I hadn’t felt in so long. He was like walking into a house and feeling at home. It would take me almost two years to realize that place that felt like home was actually a prison.

Woman behind grid

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